Oct 11, 2010

October Birthday Girl...



Life imitates art...

 It did not imitate art in this instance because nobody ordered the Jagermeister.

My daughter is the one in the middle. Her dad is trying to convince her and her friends to stay home and play with Barbies instead of going out on the town.

It didn't work...Oktoberfest was calling and she had her own stein. 

That's apple cider...really! My daughter thinks that was Barbie's drink of choice.

Happy Birthday, Kiddo!

Oct 7, 2010

The neighbors...

The neighbor's house at Halloween...

Ghost guards...

Pumpkin people...

Scarecrow family...I call the one in the background, "Creeping Crow."

Sep 28, 2010

Fall...


Simply Fall...

Ina Garten Pumpkin Cupcakes with Maple Frosting...


"Gingerbread" Haunted House

Fall decorations


Mantel Pilgrims


Halloween Banner


Mrs. Pumpkin


Halloween Tree


Sep 12, 2010

Sew Blue...

 My sister and I made those blue drapes in the dining room. I decided that using a toile tablecloth to make them was a brilliant idea. It is if you can find enough of them. I did not. It made me think of math class in high school. It would have been a good idea to pay attention. I did not. Fortunately for me my sister did. She saved the day.

She helped me make these curtains too. I got to hold the tape measure. She got to read it. I guess the difference between one half and five eighths of an inch is significant sometimes.

I did not upholster these chairs. I do not have the patience nor the skills. I sold a child to get them. (not really)

I made these drapes on my own. A rectangle shape is manageable. Using a glue gun to attach the fringe is even more manageable. I expect a call from my sister immediately after she reads this. I told her I sewed the fringe on with invisible thread.

Nothing to sew here. So I have decided this has to be my favorite spot in the house. My sister helped me here too. This Cinderella slipper and coach is located in the foyer. If Prince Charming shows up we are ready. I have my daughter's bags packed and waiting in the hall closet. She has no idea. (again, not really)


Sep 8, 2010

Martha Stewart, my sister and me...

In 1994 I met Martha Stewart. Twice. She has no memory of meeting me. I remember her very well. I have the business card holder in the above picture to remember her by. I also have her autograph in the following picture and a story about my sister, and Martha.
Martha autographed her business card for me because I could not afford to buy her Entertaining book at the time. She was very understanding and kind.  I walked away basking in the Martha glow. Above the autograph was a phone number. During Martha's talk she told the audience that we could call her if we ever had a question about gardening or cooking or anything craft related. So one night my sister and her best friend were sharing a bottle of wine.

Conversation turned to Martha.

The discussion centered around Martha's astrological sign.

A debate ensued.

 Opinions differed and wine flowed.

 Martha's business card was whipped out of the handy business card holder and the phone number listed on the card was dialed lickety- split. The time difference was not considered. It was late. And three hours later where Martha lives. Martha had told us at the event that she only sleeps about four hours a night and leaves her light on with a note pad and pencil next to her bed in the event she gets a good idea in the middle of the night and needs to write it down. In my sister and her friend's defense I must say the number they were dialing was believed to be an office number. My sister and her pal thought they would leave a message and hope for an answer in return. Turns out it was Martha's home phone number and she answered at two in the morning as chipper and lively as if it were the middle of the day. My sister was bolstered by a little vino and felt quite bold. She also really needed to know Martha's sign.

So she asked.

Martha playfully answered, "What do you think I am?"

My sister responded with " Scorpio?"

and Martha said,

 "Wrong!" in a sing-song voice, and then said, "I'm a Leo!"

 My sister said, "Of course you are! I should have known!"

 Martha then asked my sister if she had a cooking or planting or craft question for her. My sister said no and then went on to say she was just a nutty California girl who wanted to win a bet. Martha laughed. My sister thanked her for her time and wished her a good night. Martha wished her the same. A few months went by and Martha came back to our neck of the woods and gave a little talk at a fancy garden center by the beach. I met her for a second time. I sort of followed her around the garden center while the owner gave her a tour of the place. I was early for the event and she was too and I didn't want to sit in the hot sun so I tagged along a few paces behind them and eavesdropped while Martha and the owner talked flowers.  She knew what she was talking about. I didn't have a clue. She spoke of flowers and planting and other garden related issues. I do not have a green thumb. I didn't tell her. I pretended to be a garden gal like all the other people there that day even if all I really cared about was where she bought the fabulous cornflower blue suit she was wearing and who did her hair.  And that's my story about Martha Stewart, my sister and me.

Aug 23, 2010

Time's a wastin'...

I've been gone for a while...Come on in and see what's been happening.


made some curtains for my kitchen...


finished the kitchen...


and this room too...


had a birthday...


ate some of this...chocolate and peanut butter cake



and celebrated again with another cake...



had a pinata filled with lotto tickets, whoopie cushions, poppers, and party horns. We had a winner!



finished with this little number...



hung out with these two beauties...



hung out with this guy too...



and read a few books...

and

spent a lot of time reading all of your blogs.

I'd say I have been extremely productive.

Apr 29, 2010

Lights Out...

Next time I book a room at a fancy hotel I won't ask for extra towels. I'll ask for extra light bulbs. Light bulbs that have more light in them than one little firefly. This is the room my sister and I stayed in last weekend. Can you see her? All the lights are on.
We took the black lampshade off the center light so I could take this picture of my sister getting ready to go to bed. It was too cold to go swimming so she is diving into her bed instead. The beds in this hotel cater to giants. I counted 4 mattresses. There may have been more but I'll never know because I'm a product of "all I really need to know I learned in kindergarten." I did a triple dismount worthy of the Olympic Games every time I launched myself off the bed. By Sunday I was so good at it that I took a flying leap and bounced off my sister's bed right into the bathroom scoring a 9.5 with the judges, otherwise known as the people in the room below us who thought they were experiencing "The Big One!" a California earthquake. Next time I'm bringing my miner's cap, a ladder and a chalk bucket to chalk up my hands for a better grip on the bedpost so I can score a perfect 10.

Mar 5, 2010

Breakfast anyone?

It's almost time for open house again at school. The little artists are hard at work drawing pictures for their families to see. I decided to give you a small preview of what's in store for you. Can you guess the title of the first picture? It's very obvious if you ask me. It's . . . "Pancake Machine". At least that's what the 7 year old artist calls it. The second picture is a "Pancake on a Stick" employee forced to wear a ridiculous hat. The artist calls it, "Pancake Robot". I'm not so sure this student has ever eaten a pancake in his life or even seen one. Education isn't what it used to be.

Feb 23, 2010

Birds of a feather...

Spring has sprung early at my house... I forgot to put up a "No Vacancy" sign and a bird laid some eggs in the nest on my front door wreath. I left a rent receipt. It left bird poop.
anyone know where I can get a little bird saddle?

I call this "bird on a wire"... they don't call me the clever one for nothin'
I call this whatever I want on any given day...most of the time I just whistle at it...
I call this "Art"...because it didn't come from Target.

Feb 8, 2010

Observation...







We added a new kitchen to our house recently.

The granite we chose for the kitchen is called Juparana India Gold.

Very unique.
Very lovely.
Very chic.

Or not...

Went to a fast food restaurant with a co-worker today and to my surprise I saw my countertops in abundance there.

Either "Farmer Boy" is tryin' to class up their burger joint or I have a kitchen that looks like a "Farmer Boy" dining room.

The same granite in my kitchen was the topper to the trash receptacle and the bar counter by the window.

Classy...

Jan 22, 2010

My marriage in a nutshell...


The following is an email I sent to my husband who is out of the country right now.

I am not.


To whom it may concern,


Houston we have a problem...

Remember the other day when I pointed at the entry wall and said it looked a little funny? Well, when the housekeeper came today she walked in and said, "Holy Guacamole! Look at your wall!"


I was right! There is something wrong....we have a leak and the wall bubbled up under the stairs in the front entry area...It looks like a balloon got trapped between the wall and the paint. It's creeping down the hallway going toward the laundry room and under the upstairs landing.

It does not match our decor.

It is not pretty.

I do not like it.

Until you get back I will take showers in the downstairs bathroom or not at all...

Hopefully it's not the crapper and I fall through the ceiling one day while I'm minding my own business...that would be hilarious don't you think? :)

How are you? Enjoying Paradise while I hold up the house by sticking my thumb in the hole that used to be a wall?...ha ha.....

The fun never ends when you stay home...

Our son took out the trash cans last night in the monsoon when he got home from work without me even asking..good thing..cause the trash man came today. Guess Martin Luther King Jr. Day doesn't warrant that big of a holiday...trash people still have to work. Apparently only people who work in banks and post offices are worthy.

Well, that's all that's happening in our neck of the woods...

Have fun...don't worry about us...we are building an ark and will test it out in the yard which used to have a pool...now it's a lake. The rain is still as strong as ever..it looks like nighttime during the day. It's pitch black right now as I look out the library window...cool and creepy at the same time. The kids are carrying flashlights to get to the library. It's an adventure...or Armageddon...not really sure yet.



Saw Dr. Love yesterday. She had great advice for me...I am trying to remember it today. Took me a while to get home. The freeways were flooded in spots. I listened to Raw Dog and Blue Collar comedy on the radio...essentially I laughed all the way home as I gripped the wheel trying to stay on the road. People were driving very carefully...only one idiot flew past in a monster truck...probably had to go to the bathroom. Everyone else was careful. Didn't see any major accidents and wasn't in any major accident. All is quiet on the Western Front.

Well, gotta go...time to switch thumbs.

love ya the mostest...
Your wife - who isn't the toastiest right now....a little wet and loving it! You really are missing a great storm..and that is no exaggeration. I swear...well, actually I don't, but that's for another day and another email...:)


After pouring out my heart in the above email I received the following response from my husband:


call me.


it is only a penny a minute.



A man of few words, married to a woman of many. Opposites attract and we certainly did.