Eggnog is bad for you...

It makes you kiss your presents...

We had to wait until she kissed all these...

It hasn't affected this little lady yet...
or this serene moment...
Another peaceful moment...

And then this...she is being sent back to the kids table next year, and I'm going with her.
This side of the room had a "Where the Wild Things Are" moment...the eggnog was flowing like a river over there...
This side of the room was on "Santa Watch"...
but not this guy...nobody knows what he was doing

This guy found Santa and his helper caught him...

Santa! He doesn't look too happy that he's been caught...
We took pictures with Santa...
You are never too old for that...

Santa Paws loved it...

Hope you loved your holiday too!

Annual Gingerbread House Extravaganza...

Wake up Linnie! It's time to make Gingerbread Houses!

This one belongs to my sister...
She had one too many of those wax candy drinks...I have contacted the authorities.
These are the finished products. Can you guess which one is mine?
It's the one my sister named, "Santa's Outhouse." It's the best I could do with arms like a T.rex.
My sister put some gummie guards on duty to watch over her house. I don't know why...nobody wants to eat her house. Even she doesn't want to eat it and it's not because I licked everything when she wasn't looking.
I forgot to lick this side...
My favorite (only) daughter made this one...
I did not lick it.

Christmas cheer . . .

I'm pretty sure this guy is the real deal...even if he did bring me a set of drums, a train set and a race track for Christmas the year I was eight. My husband got the same presents the year he was eight too. I'm pretty sure we were destined to be together based on this principle alone.

I'm pretty sure praying isn't going to help me much this year...but I'm still going to pray that nobody repeats those presents from my eighth Christmas.

I'm pretty sure my daughter doesn't like Nutcrackers. They stand watch on the staircase. They watch my daughter fall down the slippery wooden stairs and wipe out on the landing taking a few of these guys down in the process. Around here we call it "Nutcracker Bowling." Christmas wouldn't feel the same if this didn't happen every year. I never intend to carpet the stairs.
I'm pretty sure this is illegal in our state... but if my brother-in-law doesn't catch that squirrel there will be no Christmas dinner.
I'm pretty sure this guy had a headache the day after Christmas...Some people just can't handle their eggnog...

and some dogs can't handle it either...

I hope you are handling the Holidays just fine!

Thanksgiving...

Look who won the Thanksgiving centerpiece. Lucky me!

Join in the fun at: Candid Carrie's Foto Friday Fiesta

It is what it is . . .

It's time to take a blogging break.

Thank you Lynngweeny, Swirl Girl, Candid Carrie, Teri, Kat, Kath, and everyone else who has visited and read this blog and been there from the start. I have had a lot of fun writing and posting. I will still visit all of your blogs as I have come to know so many of you and enjoy your life stories in this wonderful blogging world. .

Adios for now.

Happy all the time . . .

Once upon a time I received a gift certificate for a beauty day at the local nail salon. A day filled with the works. A spa manicure and pedicure. I was pretty excited. When I drove up to the salon I saw the name "Happy Time Nails" on the door and told my hands and feet to get ready for a fun-filled experience.

I entered the salon and was greeted excitedly by the owner and ten nail ladies all beckoning me to come in and sit in the happy glamour nail chair. At least I think that's what they said. I was the only customer in the joint. Either this was a very exclusive salon or the worst salon. I got a gut feeling that told me to run. I should have followed my instincts. I would have been right and not in need of medical assistance when the day was over.

I awkwardly climbed up on the nail chair and turned to face my chosen nail lady. She grinned at me and said something like, "You like me?" I nervously smiled back and said something intelligent like, " Um?" She laughed and slapped my foot as she pushed my pant leg up to my inner thigh. I heard a rip. The little lady had strong hands. She had torn my jeans up to mid-thigh with her tiny little doll hands. I wasn't expecting her to alter my clothing too. This was some salon. I came in wearing boot leg jeans and I was going to leave in a pair of cut-offs to show off my new pedicure. What a surprise. I wasn't so sure I was very happy about it yet. Hopefully they lived up to their name.

She turned on the jet powered water bath and immersed my feet. Another person had snuck up behind me and turned on the vibrating chair feature. I was expecting a relaxing experience. Instead I felt like I was riding a mechanical bull. I asked for a seat belt to keep me from sliding off the chair and onto the floor. They covered their mouths and giggled. I held on tight and wondered when the happy part was going to start.

My special nail lady with the super power hands pulled out my right foot and placed it on the towel covered bar. She examined my foot as she reached under the chair and pulled out an electric sander. She flipped the switch and there was a momentary power surge. Everything stopped, the lights dimmed for a second, and then everything went back to normal again. She pressed the sander to the bottom of my foot and my leg did an involuntary rocket kick. She grabbed my flailing foot and set the sander to my heel. She ground off a full shoe size before I asked her to move to the other foot to even out the size. I wanted my shoes to flop equally when I left. I made it through that portion of the ordeal only to have her put the sander away and bring out a drill. She was going to shape my toenails. Sand away the ridges. Even them out. Sand them off completely. And then try and sand off my pinkie toe as well. I saw red, and it wasn't the nail polish color I had chosen. I decided I had about all the "Happy Time" I could take and said I just remembered that I had to go.

Now.

The nail lady wrapped my foot in toilet paper and I hobbled out the door as the salon owner told me there was no charge for the experience. I said, "Well, I'm really happy about that."

the end...

Happy Easter . . .

You are never too old to take pictures with the Easter Rat. He uses his ears like arms to hug the ladies.

Aren't these beautiful? They came from a bakery named, "Some Crust".

These came from a day of making my sister slave over a hot oven. I'm particularly fond of the blue icing.
They taste amazing.
I made these party favors for my guests. It's all about the candy.

I found this nest in my yard. If those eggs hatch, Easter is ruined, my table decoration is ruined, and I will be really grossed out.

Do you leave refreshments for the Easter Bunny? This year I'm leaving him a note with the keys to my liquor cabinet. I drank everything while preparing the Easter feast for my family. I need to blame someone. He won't mind. I'm sure he's sick of carrots anyway.
Happy Easter everyone! One more thing...

... I can't leave without showing you these. These are bunny faces. I can't stop making them. Or eating them.
My sister can't stop making these gingerbread candy houses. Does anyone know of a Gingerbread Rehab group? I would love to drop this off on Monday so they can eat it during snack time.

Stay in school . . .

Last night was Open House at our school. This kid drew a crown on herself in every picture. Her name is Queeny. No joke.

Three students have healthy body images. Two don't. They think they are Aliens.

One kid thinks he's Elvis.
This one is in counseling.
This is what happens to your body if you eat too many sweets. Works for me.

This is an endangered animal. Probably a good thing.

This is our token Vampire Child.

This one is trying to hide her hamster with a side ponytail. I still see it.

This one is hiding something under his desk.

This one is Gumby's daughter.
This is me. I went a little heavy on the lipstick.

This is the view from my library counter looking out at the hallway. I use a long hook to catch my friends and co-workers as they race by. They love it. I think I see someone belly crawling by my door right now.
This is where I sit and read stories to the students. Personal favorites of mine are, "There really is a monster under your bed," and "Mom and Dad love your brother more than you," and the best of all is "You and your therapist: a beginners guide". Classics.

This is the library. I have a look - but don't touch - policy. It stays cleaner that way.

Thanks for attending our Open House.